fuzzypuzzle

Ridley Scott Signs on to Direct Shitty Movie For Boatloads of Cash

Do not pass GO, do collect millions you cheap frickin' whore. Ridley Scott, the visionary director of classic films Alien, Blade Runner and Gladiator has lowered himself to directing movies based on Hasbro board games. From the Hollywood Reporter:

"Monopoly" marks the latest Hasbro property to look to pass go and head to the big screen. Board games and branded properties have become more attractive as studios look to mitigate risk by finding built-in audiences.

Universal is working with Hasbro on several projects as part of a long-term development deal. Platinum Dunes is producing its feature adaptation of "Ouija Board," while the maritime classic "Battleship" is also in development. Elsewhere at Hasbro, Paramount this summer is set to release Stephen Sommers' feature based on its "G.I. Joe" character. And "Trivial Pursuit: America Plays" is now airing as a syndicated television program.

New Pepsi Logo (Ahem, Brand) Pricetag, Several Hundred Million?!

Hey, I don't want to sh%t where I eat, but several hundred million seems a little steep even to me. Kudos to the Arnell group for landing the con job (Ahem) account. They undoubtedly have a very big thesaurus that has lot's of variations for words like "movement", "action" and "heritage".  In their defense, they did make this cute video about the process of redrawing the Pepsi stripe (originally swiped from Coca Cola) and choosing a more contemporary typeface. Read more about conning hapless corporations with bullshit design speak over at Gawker.

Because Alex Rodriguez, Tony Hawk, Kobe Bryant and Michael Phelps Need MORE Money

OMG! They're all together just hanging out in their underwear and matching pink shirts (?!) They look like they're having so much fun! This is so f-ing cool! I'm gonna run out and buy it right now! (Door closes -- footsteps out in the driveway -- car starting up and driving away -- gun shot in the distance)

I Think I Found a Sitter!

Swiped over at boingboing

Urban Sprawl FAIL

More Monday morning goodness from the always entertaining FAILblog.
 

We're the NY Times, And We Take Journalism VERY Seriously.

Fitty Sues Taco Bell – Where My Money Be At, Bitch?!

Taco Bell's Head of Marketing is probably looking for work.

NEW YORK (Dow Jones)--Rapper Curtis Jackson, who performs under the stage name 50 Cent, sued Yum Brands Inc.'s (YUM) Taco Bell Corp. on Wednesday for allegedly using his name, persona and trademarks in a nationwide advertising campaign without his permission.

The lawsuit, filed in U.S. District Court in Manhattan, alleges Taco Bell drafted a fake letter it purported asks Jackson to change his name to "79 Cent," "89 Cent" or "99 Cent" in order to publicize its "79-89-99 Cent Why Pay More Value Menu."

The restaurant chain allegedly released the letter to the national press in June before sending it to Jackson, the complaint said. The letter reads "like a poorly written voice-over for one of Taco Bell's television commercials," the lawsuit said.

"Thus, without authorization, Taco Bell traded on the name of the world's biggest hip-hop star to draw attention to its new hip-hop-based advertising campaign, and thereby generated massive publicity for its business," the lawsuit said.

As part of the campaign, the chain's Web site included a "Rap Name Creator," which allowed users to see what their rap name would be, and offered a "Why Pay Mo' Rhyme Generator," which played hip-hop music and displayed a montage of hip-hop-themed scenes, according to the complaint.

"Simply put, Taco Bell knew that it would likely have had to pay Jackson a multi-million-dollar fee to get his endorsement, even if he had agreed to do it - which is in doubt," the lawsuit said. "Rather than face rejection or pay fair value, Taco Bell chose to steal his endorsement and to enjoy all the publicity of being associated with a mega-star while bearing none of the costs."

The complaint claims Jackson limits his endorsement "to products of the highest quality" and has demanded any endorsement deals permit him to "maintain strict control over the manner in which his name, likeness and trademarks are used."

Jackson claims the letter damaged his reputation as a hip-hop performer "by associating him with the pedestrian rap lyrics and hip-hop-themed games" on Taco Bell's Web site. The lawsuit also said he has been criticized on blogs for "selling out" because consumers believe he has endorsed Taco Bell as a result of the letter.

The lawsuit is seeking more than $1 million in damages.

Yum Brands didn't immediately return a phone call seeking comment Wednesday

Racists Bad at Photoshop Clone Tool

Apparently The Sun thought Prince William's boat trip would sell more papers if there were no Rastas pictured onboard. Funny, I always thought the opposite. See more attrocious Photoshop Disasters here.

Uh, Yeah. Thanks For That.

My buddy was trying to convince me this mumbling retarded guy is rich and famous.

Independent Film is Kinda' Stupitt Sometimes